“the story of the glass slipper [is] as pernicious as the limitation of the glass ceiling”
The tension between men and women today is palpable. “In their efforts to manage the feeling of shame, some men [and women] numb themselves. Others sink under it and slip into depression or chronic under [or over] achievement. And others take the pain that they feel and project it back out into the world with violent words and deeds.”[i]
“In one study of heterosexual, college-age couples, when the men were told that their girlfriends had scored better on a test than they had, their self-esteem plummeted. Yet it rose when they were told that their girlfriend had done poorly. The women were fine either way.”[ii]
“More than half of American adults are unmarried, and researchers have found (2018) that even among those who are married, 30 percent of relationships are severely strained. A quarter of Americans now live alone, and as the song says, one is the loneliest number.”[iii]
Insight # 69 comes to us from Emily Witt (b. 1981) an American investigative journalist with a focus on modern dating from the feminine perspective.
“‘The more incoherent romance and marriage become, the more the stories of romance proliferate and assume an ever more pivotal cultural role.’ She finds the story of the glass slipper—the arrival of a man who represents the ‘perfect fit’—to be as pernicious as the limitation of the glass ceiling: it leaves many women feeling responsible for the failure of their lives to conform to what she contends is an impossible standard. ‘No matter if they love too much or too little,’ she laments, ‘it’s still all on them to make the damned thing work.’”[iv]
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Additional Reading:
- Sexuality, The ABC’s of Simple Reality, Vol 2
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[i] Klein, Avi. “Men, # Me Too and Therapy.” The New York Times Sunday. July 1, 2018, p. 10.
[ii] Myers, Robbie. “The Plight of Working Women.” The New York Times Book Review. March 25, 2018, p. 16.
[iii] Kristof, Nicholas. “Let’s Wage a War on Loneliness.” The New York Times Sunday Review. November 10, 2019, p. 11.
[iv] Witt, Emily. “The Glass Slipper.” The New York Times Book Review. October 6, 2013, p. 30.
